Oh that can be so frustrating. Working with lenders can be a real thorn. Since you are a veteran, have you considered getting a VA loan. Their terms are very competitive and there is not mortgage insurance necessary if your equity is low. I would definitely look into refinancing with VA.
VA loans are a great option, IF you have VA entitlement available, your credit, income, and property meet their guidelines, you haven’t been 30+ days late on your current loan, and you don’t already have a VA loan.